This must be said. If you come out in public to say Obama is a Nazi or fascist, then you will be called a jerk. And you deserve to be called a jerk. And that person who calls you a jerk will have a friend who sidles in from across the room, and she will chime in saying, “you are a dumb jerk.” And that’s perfectly apt, because “a Dumb” by itself can at least be endearing, like someone with Downs Syndrome who is trying to work through a puzzle. And “a Jerk” by itself can potentially be reasoned with on some level if you can get on equal footing with said Jerk or lull him into letting his guard down.
But when you combine the two… then you’ve got a Dumb Jerk on your hands… and that is some serious shit.
A Jerk is more dangerous than a Dumb because a Jerk can do a lot of damage and he knows how to do it well. There’s focus to it. Like a Jerk Laser. But most dangerous of all is when you compound Jerkdom with Dumbassery, because you end up with a lot of collateral damage. Like someone who does a sloppy wheelkick and just manages to take out a few more foes than friendlies (and that cool lamp you bought that looks like a Greek column). Worst of all, there’s a good chance some Smart Jerk will pick up on his antics and champion him. Then he’ll believe he’s a champion. And he’ll go do more wheelkicks.
If that happens, he is officially a doosh.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for the 1st Amendment. And I’ll be the first to admit, it’s fun to call people Hitler. I call people Hitler all the time.—because it’s ridiculous—and drawing the little moustache on posters of models and celebrities always makes me laugh. It’s putting something extreme on a non-extreme object. It makes for good humor. Calling someone Hitler in jest is like farting loudly in church and claiming it’s the Holy Spirit. But there’s a reason I wouldn’t release food ghosts into microphones at town hall meetings, and it’s the very same reason I don’t label Obama a Nazi. Because it makes no fucking sense. It’s obnoxious as hell. And it is completely counterproductive in a national conversation about health care reform.
We have an opportunity to participate in a meaningful dialogue. The discussion of health care can include such topics as ethics, pharmaceutical methods, market forces, international relations, technology, all that stuff. But it is amazingly frustrating trying to delve into this complicated issue when some Dumb Jerk mouth breather is shoving a swastika in my face. Having my psychological buttons pushed is really annoying while I’m trying to learn things.
Here is a more specific reason why you are a Dumb Jerk if you say Obama is Hitler:
Making a comparison between Obama and Hitler is a heightened version of a logical fallacy often couched within debates. Two, actually.
1.) It’s an ad hominem which means “an argument against the man,” where you attack the character or beliefs of a person rather than the substance of her argument.
2.) It’s also a “Straw Man” argument. As per Wikipedia: To "attack a straw man" is to create the illusion of having refuted a proposition by substituting a superficially similar proposition (the "straw man"), and refuting it, without ever having actually refuted the original position.
So if I talk about someone’s ideas as “fascist,” or “Hitler-esque,” I bring her position to a level I can easily attack without actually addressing what was originally put forward. This fallacy happens a lot during debates on the news. Especially as it can sound legitimate and there is little time to unravel the truth from the fiction. Proponents of such discourse seem to replicate when they get airtime and hence, credence.
I’ve avoided saying anything either way about Obama, because this isn’t really about him. It’s absolutely essential to challenge our leaders. Put ‘em through the ringer. But damn. Don’t be a Dumb Jerk about it. Nothing is worse than a Dumb Jerk. Unless it’s a Hippie. Then you’ve got a Self-Righteous Universalist Hippie Jerk with Beads. Some Hippie Jerk once scolded me for throwing out a paper plate instead of reusing it. His argument was fundamentally correct. I could have reused the plate. It’s not like a bird took a dump on it or anything. But throwing the jerk juice my way just made me resentful and defensive. I avoided environmentalism for years after that incident. For true. That Hippie did way more harm than good by being a jerk.
Now I carry a reusable plate with me. It has a picture of a cute monster waving hello on it. Nothing jerky about that!
To sum up. Don’t make straw men or ad hominem attacks. If you do, rethink the argument and try something else. Then listen to the opposition. Don’t let anyone pull that Hitler shit on you. Tell him to read a history book and stop using language he doesn’t understand. And get yourself a reusable monster plate. Otherwise, you’re a Dumb Jerk.
(P.S. I know calling people Dumb Jerks is technically an ad hominem. But being silly and ironic gets me the ladies. – wink and fade out.)
News update!
"Nothing is worse than sitting down at my breakfast table to a hot cup of coffee and jammy toast, looking out the window, and discovering that some 6-year-old is stomping about in my yard, digging up worms and begging for cookies. These little simpletons are a menace and a burden. But unless you have one of your own, there is little you can do to control them. Parents and police are no help. I know! After thousands of letters and countless rake-brandishing incidents, I've deduced that while some kids may be curbed, most of them pay no heed to me and my complaints. In fact, I suspect some parents were sending children out to my yard just to enrage me.